My husband told me I was not “adventurous” when he was leaving me. I still don’t know what he meant by that. No, I don’t like sailing and I don’t drive a go-kart, is that what he wanted? Is it because sometimes I like to stay home or because I don’t go out for happy hour drinking margaritas all evening? Is it because I like my steak medium well to well done? Am I lame in the romance dept.? Am I just plain boring??
Merriam-Webster: adventurous, adj., 1: disposed to seek adventure, or to cope with the new or unknown; 2: characterized by unknown dangers and risks
I would say I am adventurous in many senses. Each living day presents something new and unknown that I cope with, therefore I am adventurous. I get out of bed and face the day instead of remaining curled up in a ball crying my eyes out, except for those few days… Sometimes I wear mismatched clothes and no lipstick, sorry Mom. Sometimes I’m matchy-matchy. I risk getting an Ambush Makeover! I gave my heart to someone. I took a vow. I take leaps of faith. I moved away from my family to live in San Francisco. We bought a house. We got married. We had a baby. We traveled all over, to many parts of the U.S., Canada, Mexico, Europe and Scandinavia in planes, trains, automobiles, boats and an RV. You know I don’t like to fly but I do because I want to go places and I wanted to go everywhere with him and I did. I flew to Sweden all by myself to meet him and his family there, that’s adventurous! I ate at a herring buffet in Hovs Hollar, mystery meat tacos in Puerto Vallarta, lobster in Gloucester.
I took a helicopter ride over the Grand Canyon. I rode in our Land Cruiser over the Rubicon Trail. I drove an RV across the U.S. I drive in San Francisco (and recently went the wrong way down a one-way street), I drive all over the Bay Area, and I drive in the HMB Safeway parking lot, that’s adventurous! I honk my horn and speak my mind, that’s adventurous! I’ve changed my hair color many times, that’s adventurous! I go see live music, I go out to eat, I take walks, I ride my bike, I started a sewing business, I go to church. I laugh, I joke, I talk, I cry, I sing, I dance, I get moody. I gaze at the full moon, I marvel at the ocean, the sunrise and the sunset. I get out of bed every single day and face the world for my son and me. I live, that’s adventurous.
This will haunt me as long as I let it. However, I refer to it often wondering what other people’s perceptions of “adventurous” are. At least now I’m in a place where I can see and appreciate my own sense of adventure in myself and I love it. I’m not boring and I don’t sit here like a bump on a log. I do try new things but I’m not really wild (like I was in my 20’s). I go out a lot by myself now and often with my friends and family when I see them. Sometimes I just want a simple family life because things change when you have a child. Maybe that’s what happened but that’s not a bad thing. I don’t need to be doing lots of “adventurous” things all the time but I do like to experience life and see the world.
And I tried everything he asked…it didn’t matter in the end.
Be yourself. Have your own adventure in life and love.
p.s. did I mention I ate at a herring buffet?
p.s.s I have also shopped at Frederick’s of Hollywood